try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
