TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
My penis needs a shock collar
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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