I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
