Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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