just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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