you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
