i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
