Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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