oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
