its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The best revenge is premature balding
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize