FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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