I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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