Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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