I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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