I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
