so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
