just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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