I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
