Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
