the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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