Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
