Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
