Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
