bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
