Sponge bath it is.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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