he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
