so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize