oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
The adults are the big ones right?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
