We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize