i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
