there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I didn't notice because vodka
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
