I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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