Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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