Having a random hookup so left but love u
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Is it because I queefed?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize