Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
