did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
