omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
