I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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