sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You have to summon your inner elephant
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize