Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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