Me too!
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
