We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just forgot I was standing up.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
