I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize