Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Screwed.edu
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
