she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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