The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just found a bag of teeth...
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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