Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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