yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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