That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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