I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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