i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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